When You First Hear the Words: “Your Child Has Autism”
There are moments in life that stop you in your tracks — moments that divide everything into before and after.
For many parents, hearing the words “your child has autism” is one of those moments.
If you’re reading this, you might be standing right there — at the beginning of a journey you didn’t expect, filled with love, uncertainty, and more questions than answers. I want you to know something before anything else: you’re not alone.
Take a Deep Breath — It’s Okay to Feel Everything
The first step is not to do anything. It’s to feel.
You might feel scared, relieved, confused, sad, or even validated. You might cycle through all of those in a single afternoon — and that’s completely okay. Every emotion has a place here.
What matters is giving yourself permission to process. This isn’t your fault, and it’s not something that needs “fixing.” It’s a new understanding of how your child experiences and interacts with the world.
Autism doesn’t erase the child you love. It simply gives you a new lens to see them through — one that helps you understand how they learn, communicate, and connect.
Step One: Learn, but Don’t Overwhelm Yourself
The internet can be both a blessing and a burden. It’s easy to get lost in articles, opinions, and “miracle solutions.” Start small.
Focus on credible, evidence-based sources and professionals who view your child as a whole person — not just a diagnosis.
Understanding the basics of Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA), speech therapy, and occupational therapy can help you make informed decisions about early intervention. But remember: the goal isn’t to change who your child is, it’s to support how they grow.
Step Two: Build Your Support Team
You don’t have to navigate this alone. Your first calls might be to:
Your pediatrician, to discuss referrals or next steps.
A Board Certified Behavior Analyst (BCBA) for early intervention planning.
Speech and occupational therapists who can support communication and sensory needs.
As you meet professionals, listen to your gut. You deserve a team that treats you as a partner — one that celebrates every success, no matter how small.
Step Three: Create Space for Joy
Amid the evaluations and therapy sessions, don’t forget to just be with your child. Play, laugh, cuddle, explore.
Therapy is important — but so is love, laughter, and connection. Your child’s progress will flourish in an environment built on joy and understanding.
Step Four: Find Your Community
There’s power in connection. Seek out parent support groups, both locally and online. Surround yourself with others who get it — who can remind you that you’re not walking this path alone.
If you’re local to South Florida, our team at Play to Learn Behavior Therapy hosts family workshops, social groups, and parent trainings to help you feel supported every step of the way.
Step Five: Give Yourself Grace
You are learning just as much as your child is.
There will be hard days, but also days filled with breakthroughs, smiles, and pride so strong it takes your breath away.
Progress looks different for every child, but every step forward — no matter how small — is meaningful.
A Final Word from My Heart
As a therapist, I’ve had the privilege of walking beside many families at this very starting point.
What I’ve learned is this: the journey ahead may look different from what you once imagined, but it can be beautiful.
You don’t have to have all the answers right now. You just need to take the next loving step.
And we’re here to take it with you. 🌱
— Anita Tomic, BCBA
Play to Learn Behavior Therapy